Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Six miles to better mental health..

Hi, semi-annonymous blog-world.. How is everyone feeling this evening/morning/afternoon, whenever this post finds you? I myself am feeling a little pesto-woozy.. I make the stuff about 4 times a year, because it takes me about 3 months to recover from the overdose of it.. I really make the best pesto, too good.. So irresistible that I eat the whole batch that's designed to last for a few good lunches.. And then those basil leaves expand in my stomache, and make me wonder what I was thinking.. I never learn.. So I hit a hilly running course today, trying to get back into some level of fitness that will put a little more fear into my competitors' hearts.. At least enough to stop them from being able to talk to me during an event.. It is a wickedly windy evening.. 35 mph winds, and I'm pushing the hills, so my heart is pounding away, and I'm totally incapable of talking.. (Who would try to talk to a runner in such a state, you may ask.. Good question.. And in the middle of a back farm road with little traffic.. ) Well, some poor soul found themselves lost on the road.. My mind was so out of it, I wasn't even aware they were slowing down to ask me directions. Directions! It was all I could do to keep breathing and moving forward, directions was about as realistic as flying.. I didn't want to be rude though, so I gasped out, 'I don't know anything around here!', which came out sounding like a snarky fishwife.. Really ugly voice, I didn't know I had it in me.. The woman said 'Oh, that's really nice', or something like that, as I wheezed on.. I felt really angry, and wasn't sure why.. At first I thought I was angry at the woman.. Couldn't she SEE that I was doing a tortured workout on a blustery day?? Why are people so mindless about what others are going through? But then after a little more time went by, and my breathing went back to normal.. I realized that my nature is to help other people, and had I not been running, I would have happily given this woman directions or anything else she needed.. So my anger was really at myself.. For not being the nice person that I know I am.. But then on further inspection of this situation, I decided that training hard is my right, and truly one of the only times during the day that it's ok for me to be selfish.. And if someone has to miss out on me giving them directions so I can get through my workout, that doesn't make me a bad person.. The trick is to treat myself like I'm my own coach, and protect my need to train hard.. While I'm training, that needs to be my only focus.. And it's better to just not engage in any conversing with others, because frankly, I can't talk and run hard at the same time.. So on I went, ran hard up a few more hills, and boom! Car #2 slows down in the opposite direction I'm running in, rolls his window down.. What am I, the Walmart greeter?? Do I have a sign on my back that says 'This way for directions'? I kept my resolve, and ploughed on with no eye contact.. That was easy.. As I pick up the pace to finish the run, this guy actually turns around and rolls down his window again asking for directions! I just said 'sorry' and kept moving.. Do you people reading this go through these same struggles? Is this weird? Am I worrying too much about what others are thinking? Or am I being a cretin runner deserving of all the abuse drivers often throw my way.. Maybe I should run more with other people and let them deal with those direction-seekers.. Or as Deb suggested to me, wear a t-shirt instructing not to talk to runner.. I think I need some suggestions here.. I'm not confident with my new game plan of ignoring everyone, but I don't see an alternative..

11 comments:

TrappedInColorado said...

Tamar,

I've had that happen on a strenuous bike ride. I stopped. Had too. If I ask for directions it is after I have exhausted all options and I really need help. There is a simple solution for you. I have seen shirts that say DEAF RUNNER. Get some. But be careful. Don't react to anything or you will be busted!

Peace

Deb said...

And to think I advised you to get 'blinders'. The deaf and blind running club.

Hmmm...has a catchy name to it.

However, I think that you would be too sensitive to those disabilities and just state on your shirt that you are not available for giving out mapquest information.

I AM NOT MAPQUEST! GOOD LUCK!

Done deal, right?

Mmmmmmm pesto...................

Jon said...

I want pestoooooo

I would never stop a runner... WTF people, it's not like Tamar is just going for a walk around the block.

Maybe I should drive ahead of you and deflect all on-comers :D

Deb said...

Jon, let's take two motorcycles---you drive in the front, I'll drive in the back and we'll treat her like the president. Big sunglasses and ear pieces--just like the secret service.

Whaddya' say???

Deb said...

Tamar, check this out.

http://backofthepackbaby.blogspot.com/

I think you'll find her very interesting. She's a runner in NY! :)

Tim said...

tamar: Have you ever run in a maraton? Like Boston or New York, etc.

You make me tired just *reading* about your running prowess. {yes, thin guys van be out of shape too}

Ms. Senyak said...

hi guys and gal!

~Trapped.. I hadn't thought of that, I like that idea.. But if drivers are mindless to my state of delirium, they'd probably be equally mindless to my t-shirt instructions :-(

~Deb.. hahahaha! 'I'M NOT MAPQUEST!!' Ah, they'd still be clueless.. Good find
on the fellow runner blog, I'll check it out..

~Jon, my knight in shining armor! I could use a guard on these runs, apparently.. I'm glad you appreciate the annoyingness of the situation, must be the fellow sagittarian thing..

~Green.. is it hard being you? ok, sorry, kermit the frog, you know..
yes, I've run 1 marathon.. ny, last year.. Everything went great til after the queensboro bridge.. my batteries died down..

Deb said...

My batteries died down too... Oh wait---what were we talking about again?

Tim said...

Yes, it's not easy being green. But it sure is FUN!!

I was wondeing when someone would make a comment withthat reference in it....

The Boston Marathon is coming up mext month and when I read your post that reminded me of it. I have no idea of the commitment it must take to run one of those.

I should run more or at least excersise more...

Ms. Senyak said...

~Myrsurv .. Wine was EXACTLY what I needed to perk up my mood! HA HA.. Then I would have been the one flagging down the traffic for directions..

Ms. Senyak said...

~dakota thanks for your comments! do you really crave matzo balls? I don't think I ever do.. sometimes the whole chicken soup though, sounds like the only thing that will satisfy.. It would be very sad to lose our sense of taste.. I hope that never happens..